On Peens and Boxes of Cookies

It's been oh so long since I've posted anything on this here bloggity blog. I've been working and keeping busy. The job is pretty great in terms of having time outside of work to have a life, go to yoga, go to trivia, bake food, and watch movies with Stanley Tucci in them on my instant Netflix.

Lots has happened in the last 6 months, including a cross-country trip to an amazing wedding in Pennsylvania, a girls' weekend in Seattle, and a short-lived but intense romance. You may be wondering what has inspired me to get back on the blogging horse. It must be something huge right?! Obvs.
The other day I was riding in the car with Kerry en route to see Burlesque and we heard the most amazingly inappropriate song. It is called "Shake" and it is a song about a girl who is addicted to the singer's peen. Like, asking for re-ups (a phrase my whitey self has only heard on The Wire) and getting physical withdrawals without his box of cookies (a euphemism for penis you should know after watching Burlesque, an amazing movie worthy of its own blog post). Seriously. Here are some of the lyrics:
"I got her number
We started chillin'
We started buzzin'
And got addicted
Now I, I'm the one she can't live without
I bet that's her right now

Shorty hitting me up
Says she wanna re-up
Knows I got the best in town
Cuz when she get the shivers
She nows that I delivered
I'm the one who holds her down

...

One day she started texting me
Asking if she coulda borrow that recipe
I told her, loving you is my speciality
She said, well, give it up, up, give it up, up"


We had initially chalked it up to the Biebs cause it sounded just like our favorite Canadian pre-pubescent YouTube star. (I apologize in advance for besmirching his good name in my mind). It's a young lad named Jesse McCartney who just sounds like the fabulously coiffed superstar but we should've known such innocence would never compare his own penis to crack.


It's not that I'm a prude or anything. I've been known to rock out to Teaches of Peaches or Avenue D, but they don't try to come off as teeny-boppers on the radio who just graduated from the Mickey Mouse Club though amiright? Perhaps I'm just getting old and all Helen Lovejoy on everyone.


Nah, i don't really care. Let the kiddies compare their junk to crack. I will secretly love it and listen to it. And speaking of getting old, today is my birfday! Hottness. It's been pretty rad. Got messages from friends from all corners of the globe, had a nice lunch with co-workers and am about to have dinner with some of my fav ladyfriends. This weekend I'm having a bday party at the Hop and Vine. This birthday has been so much better than last year for many reasons, not the least of which is no longer working at a job that I hate and leeches away at my soul. Of course my family and friends also make me feel like this pretty much all the time so that helps too.

It's a Movie Saturday

Friday, I went out after work with a co-worker and some mutual friends of ours and somehow spent about 4 hours in a bar without realizing it. So Saturday was quite a lazy, lounge on the bed, lounge on the couch, 30-rock watching day. I also re-watched one of my favorite movies "Me and You and Everyone We Know" before heading off to a delightful dinner with the bestie and her mom who's in town visiting. We went to see Frost/Nixon after that and now I am contemplating putting on some Harold & Maude to close out my evening.

Me & You & Everyone We Know is such a beautifully touching and remarkably un-cheesy movie about people trying to connect with each other. The casting is perfect, the music is perfect, and Miranda July (who I have a major girl crush on) writes really amazing subtle scenes with just the right amount of awkwardness, emotion, and sometimes just plain weirdness. I can't say enough about it, but really you only need one reason to see this movie and it's this:

I would have a baby only if I knew he would be this kid. The scene with ))<>(( has me in tears laughing every time I see it.

Frost/Nixon I am less crazy about, though I do like it. I had no idea Kevin Bacon was in it and I kind of giggled every time he had a major boner for Nixon. But wow, Frank Langella playing Nixon? A.Mazing. I never thought I'd feel almost bad for the guy. I wonder if someday someone will be able to make a movie that makes George Bush seem at least a little sad or worthy of some level of empathy (he should hope as much). Buuut, Nixon was much much smarter than GWB will ever dream to be and actually did have some accomplishments during his tenure, so maybe Bush will always be looked at as a huge retardo failure.

Also, it makes me sad to think that history just fuckin repeats itself. Parts of the Frost/Nixon interviews sound like they're coming straight from GWB himself (though of course, Bush isn't half as eloquent as Nixon is. He'd fuck up all the lines and sound like a retard, but the ideas and excuses are the same). This is one reason why I'm a major proponent of a serious investigation (if not prosecution, but a girl can dream..) into Bush's presidency. People like to throw out the bullshit line of "it's no time to point fingers. We have to look ahead, not back!" But if we don't look at what happened in the past, we are so fucking cliche doomed to repeat it. And Frost/Nixon is a wonderful reminder of that.

Now I think I'll watch another of my top 5 favorite movies, "Harold & Maude." I cry everytime I see it but it's so worth it. One of my favorite love stories ever. Goes to show I'd love a love story about a 19 year old and 79 year old. That shit is hot.